Nothing interesting lately. I'd like to point out that during the transition from insults to believing I'm a woman, he made reference to a clitoris being a lot like a tiny penis, and therefore not being totally inaccurate at the beginning. All righty then. I think he sees in a clitoris what a lot of men prefer to ignore. Now he's bragging about not getting my info (phone, email, ASL). That's actually relatively chivalrous of him. I wouldn't be surprised if he did try to turn it into an excuse to do exactly what he's so happy about not doing, however. Oh, I made him laugh. I'm sure he's falling in love with me. Well, he just said he liked me. "Kind of." What's that supposed to mean, bro??
He still hasn't answered. It's weird, I feel like it's abundantly clear that I'm male, just by my choice of words and sentence structure. Oh, he asked where I'm from. That will complete the ASL trinity that he so boastfully pointed out that he didn't ask about. Oh, he's from Texas. Ironic that I'm definitely messing with him. I'm not positive, but I have an inkling that he just tried to elicit a request for spanking from me. If true, disturbing.
Talking about ways to die. Quoted bash.org. Conversation getting boring.
And he left. He never found out. Toooo bad. I think what made this conversation great was that he believed the entire time, after initially assuming correctly that I am a man, that I was a woman, and I believe began to really like me, and I never once lied.
Here's the transcript:
You: O.O
Stranger: Hi
You: Stranger is typing...
Stranger: You're a huge faggot, just so you know.
You: Okay, thanks for informing me.
Stranger: Someone takes the time to write this website, yet you have nothing interesting to say.
You: Don't I?
Stranger: Apparently not.
Stranger: Entertain me.
You: Believe it or not, other people do not exist merely for your entertainment.
You: I don't care if you disconnect, my ego can take it.
Stranger: Sadly enough, you're correct.
Stranger: Tell me about your tiny penis. Or your virginity that you desperately want to lose.
You: I can tell you about one of those things.
You: Actually, that's not true.
You: There's a qualifying clause that makes both statements untrue.
Stranger: Care to elaborate?
You: "that you desperately want to lose"
Stranger: Yes, I'm aware of what i said...
You: Yes, that part makes the second sentence inaccurate.
Stranger: Is "desperately" an understatement?
You: That's surprisingly clever.
Stranger: Theres no surprises here, Stranger. I'm amazing in every possible way.
Stranger: Humble, to boot.
You: Damn, I wish I were that humble.
Stranger: Envy is something we all must deal with from time to time.
Stranger: So, educate me on your tiny penis, then.
You: I believe I said both sentences were inaccurate.
You: Look 12 messages up.
Stranger: Lies are unfortunately another thing we must deal with from time to time.
Stranger: I'm willing to look past your deceitful nature and forgive you.
You: How kind.
Stranger: Indeed.
Stranger: Are you lacking a penis, then?
You: Haven't considered that I may be a girl?
Stranger: Females are a rarity on Omegle.
You: That they are.
Stranger: So, you will forgive me for making an assumption, but given the usual encounters between myself and others... you have to see where i'm coming from.
Stranger: others on this site, that is.
You: Oh, believe me, I have experienced the same monotony.
Stranger: 95% of the users on this site, as you know, are sexually frustrated teenage boys.
Stranger: But then again, 95% of percentages are made up on the spot. ;)
You: True fact.
Stranger: So anyways... where were we?
You: Tiny penis?
Stranger: Ah!
You: Or hi?
Stranger: Lets go straight to the tiny penis.
You: I'm sure you frequently do.
Stranger: Now, the clitoris is quite similar to a tiny penis.
You: That's true. As an embryo, the two are indistinguishable.
Stranger: So, making a referance to your tiny penis is not completely innacurate.
Stranger: Exactly.
Stranger: In some adults, the two are still indistinguishable.
Stranger: As i've seen from Omegle's video counterpart.
You: Haha, yes, examples are prevalent there.
Stranger: I can't help but ask myself, if I were a hairy, middle-aged, obese man with a tiny penis... Would i bare it all on a webcam? I can't say that I would.
Stranger: Good on them for having self-confidence, though.
You: Sure, sure, I just hope they can take the judgement.
You: Video chat. One of the worst places to be on the internet.
Stranger: I'm a hairless, mid-twenties, slim man with a tiny penis and i couldn't muster the courage to show myself off on webcam.
Stranger: lol
Stranger: I almost admire them in a way.
You: They certainly have balls. Metaphorically.
Stranger: But alas, in the literal sense? Merely peas.
You: Alas.
Stranger: So what are you up to, other than Omegle?
You: Facebook, blog, email. You might describe me as an internet addict.
Stranger: Those are the usual drugs of choice for an internet addict.
You: I believe I am only missing Twitter.
Stranger: Are you surprised of the fact that i posess a penis, yet i haven't asked for your MSN, facebook, or email? Not even so much as an ASL or "what do you look like?"
You: That is remarkably strong-willed of you.
You: It is a refreshing change.
Stranger: has nothing to do with a strong will
Stranger: just lack of interest lol
You: Ouch.
Stranger: although, i would like to know how old you are.
You: I'm 20.
Stranger: Cool.
You: Definitely not a little girl.
Stranger: Nor did i assume or imply you were one.
You: I did not assume or imply an assumption or implication. Merely verifying what I'm sure you deduced on your own.
Stranger: LOL
Stranger: Checkmate.
Stranger: That induced a harty chortle.
You: Haha, I'm glad to have been of service.
Stranger: I like you, Stranger.
Stranger: Kind of.
You: Kind of?
Stranger: Well what would you expect?
You: I wouldn't, but you seemed to go out of your way to clarify that degree.
Stranger: I guess so... So where are you from, Stranger?
You: I'm from good old California. And yourself?
Stranger: Texas!
You: Ohh, guess I better not mess with you then.
Stranger: You already have it would seem.
Stranger: Our conversation started off pretty rocky...
You: Uh oh, what's the penance for that?
You: That it did.
Stranger: What would be an acceptable penance?
You: Isn't this written in the Texas Constitution or something?
Stranger: Not that I'm aware of.
Stranger: I'll leave it up to the offender.
You: Death by old age?
Stranger: So be it.
Stranger: That would suck though... I want to die in a way that would leave people talking/wondering for years.
You: I'd rather create my legacy while I'm alive.
Stranger: But you can do both!
Stranger: Live a great life and die a glorious, yet strange death!
Stranger: I want my last word to be "Hey guys, watch this!"
Stranger: words*
You: Go up to the top of a roof, string piano wire tight across the front edge at neck level, tie a cord to your foot and the other end to the building so that you'll be above sidewalk level when it's fully stretched. Then put super glue on your hands, and put your arms around the front of the wire and then back to touch your head, then you lean forward, so the piano wire cuts your neck but not your elbows. When the cord goes taut, you'll be hanging upside down with no head....except your head will be in your outstretched arms thanks to gravity and the glue, staring at someone upside down and spewing blood everywhere.
Stranger: Heard of that one before...
You: Yes, it's plagiarized.
Stranger: I'm thinkg more along the lines of fireworks+porn shop+superman costume...
You: An epic concoction, to be sure.
Stranger: Absolutely.
Stranger: Anyways, I'm off.
Stranger: Nice chatting with you!
You: You too. Thanks for cluing me in on my faggotry.
Stranger: No problem, faggot. ;)
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
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